My take on "You might be a pregnant farmer if..."

So the other day this crossed my radar, and it made me smile. While I can relate to some of these, I felt I had a little something of my own to add, most slightly more TMI than this list, but nonetheless, all very first-hand.

So here's MY two cents on being a pregnant farmer - and I gotta say, looking back it's funny, at the time, it wasn't the best fun I'd ever had.

You might be a pregnant farmer if:

  • You've ever woken up in the morning with a bad case of 'pregnancy nose' and been able to smell the chickens - which are kept 500' from the house - and it's made you gag. Or worse.

  • You've had to take a baby goat / sheep / insert other newborn furry creature to a doctor's appointment with you, because it was just born and the mama reacted with such horror that you were convinced she would trample it if left alone with it. So you wrap it in a towel and take with. And your midwife and everyone else in the clinic insists on having their pictire taken with it. (It was an angora goat, if anyone is wondering!)

  • You've had a line of hungry, disgusting chickens follow you as you do your morning chores, because occasionally you pause to vomit as you're going around, and they think it's AWESOME.

  • You've had relatives asking "But what will you do with the farm?!" when you announce your pregnancy, like no-one has ever had a baby and farmed at the same time. It's possible, I can vouch for that. It's not fun, and it's not easy. But it's possible.

  • You've ever taken four hours to fix a tiny strip of fence because you're so darn tired you might just never open your eyes again if you shut them, and lifting the post driver is killing you. (Darn those angora goats and their horns.)

  • You've cried because the farm cat caught and killed a mouse. Because hormones, y'all.

  • You've had to buy bigger Carhartts to cover your expanding belly.

  • You've ever wished that maybe you could have a goat-length pregnancy, like 145-151 days.

  • You've ever wondered if maybe your herd queen could carry the baby for you. You've seen her pregnant several times and she never got this darn sick.

  • You figure that diapering a baby can't be that hard - because you can diaper a baby goat and make it stay on.